Tuesday, September 29, 2009
2. Hence my next point. After walking the dogs in tennis shoes the next morning, I kept them on to ride to work. I haven't worn anything but flip-flops for at least 6 months now. I noticed while driving that my back was not hurting in the slightest. The next day I wore flip-flops again, and the familiar ache came back. I happened to notice that I clinch my toes on my right foot when driving in flip-flops. Like tightly. I have no idea why. I'll realize what I am doing, make a conscience effort to stop but then two minutes later, I'll notice I've gone right back to clinching them. Anyhow, somehow it correlates to my back issues so I've been trying to wear shoes while driving.
3. The only major grocery store in Benton where I live is Walmart. I don't have any choice but to shop there. I now have an ongoing, overwhelming fear of showing up on this site: People of Walmart.
4. Saturday we went to BBQ on the River in downtown Paducah. It was extremely crowded since it rained most of Thursday and Friday and Saturday was the last day so everyone showed up. We know some guys who had a vendor booth there but we felt that since we always buy BBQ from them, we should eat elsewhere. We went to a booth called Highway Ribbery. The name made me giggle. While we were eating Howard and I were discussing what to say if Stacy and the other guys asked us where we ate. Right then I heard one of the guys call out to "Stacy", a girl working at the Highway Ribbery booth. I told Howard that we technically did buy BBQ from Stacy...
5. We were heading over to the bar after the BBQ so Howard texted the bartender to see if he wanted us to bring him anything. He didn't respond. Howard told me that he would probably text back as soon as we reached the car ten minutes away. And of course that's what happened. I laughed and kept walking towards the car but good-natured Howard said we had to go back. Have I mentioned it was sweltering hot outside? I went to the car and Howard went back and got two sandwiches from the real Stacy so we could say we bought something from them. He's a lot nicer then I am.
6. I was driving down a 35 mph road going about 40 after leaving BBQ on the River. All of a sudden, a cop swung out behind me, pulled up close behind me and turned on his lights. Seriously? I didn't do anything wrong. Nothing. Still it's just an awful feeling. I felt like everyone was pointing and laughing at me. Well, until I pulled over into the right lane to stop and he went on past me and pulled over the car in front of me. Then I was the one pointing and laughing.
7. An older man at the bar on Saturday asked me which college football team I was rooting for. I explained to him that I root for a ton of different teams where my friends went because my school didn't have a football team. Somehow this led to me telling him it took me 8 years to graduate. He asked about Mason and the age group in some of my classes. I told him I had seen much older people in a lot of my classes. He told me that I inspired him to go back to school. I'm sure it wasn't just the alcohol talking. I'm truly inspiring. Anyhow, he told me he was an all-star QB in high school, making straight A's and gearing up for dentistry school (he showed me his missing tooth and laughed) when he graduated but then he discovered LSD and the Grateful Dead and followed them for 30 years instead. It was an interesting conversation to say the least.
8. Dentists are evil. Why would anyone want to be a dentist? It's just a form of legal torture.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
1. The phone I flushed down the toilet has returned...after 3 months. I happened to glance down into the toilet yesterday evening upon entering the bathroom and saw a black rectangular shape sticking out of the bottom about an inch. I immediately thought I had dropped another phone down the toilet. Without an ounce of hesitation, I plunged my hand down into the toilet, grabbed it and pulled it out. I'm lucky that it actually happened to really be my old phone and nothing else. Had I stopped to think for even a moment, I may have realized that putting a glove on my hand or wrapping my hand and arm in a plastic bag would have been more sanitary. I looked at my dripping wet, corroded phone and shed a single tear. Then I opened it, of course, and tried to turn it on. Go figure, it wouldn't work. I brought it out into the living room, still holding it with my bare hands, and held it up to Howard with a look of disbelief on my face. He said, "Jeez, Dana, you dropped another one in there?" When I told him it was my old phone, his face then changed to a look of disbelief and he asked, "And you seriously just stuck your bare hand in there to get it out?? Gross!" It was at this point it hit me I was holding a nasty, dirty phone in my hand that had been sitting in the toilet for over 3 months so I hurriedly tossed it in the trash and proceeded to scrub my arm and hand raw with soap.
2. The bagels are delicious!!!!! And I'm not just saying that. They arrived on Friday and Howard and I both ate one right away. It changed his life. He has never had a fresh bagel before. I have no idea how that could possibly be. He actually thought the store bought ones were good before this. We froze the rest of them and just take one out at night to thaw if we want one the next day. Thanks Mom!
3. I can't believe I'm admitting this but I actually hit traffic this morning. I was taking Jack to the vet in Paducah and I hit traffic on I-24. Gasp! It was backed up about 2 miles due to roadwork. However, here is the difference between VA and KY. When I first saw the sign that read "Right Lane Closed Ahead", I got into the left lane. And so did every single other car on the road. The lane didn't actually close for another 1.5 miles but not one person thought it was okay to speed down the right hand lane and cut in front of all the rest of the cars waiting patiently in the traffic. Not one car. Absolutely amazing.
4. I took Jack to the vet this morning due to an open wound on his tail. Poor little guy can't seem to stop chewing on it and this morning it was just too much for me to handle. The vet says he has a "hot spot". According to Wikipedia:
A Hot Spot, or acute moist dermatitis, is an acutely inflamed and infected area of skin irritation created and made worse by a dog licking and biting at itself. A hot spot can manifest and spread rapidly in a matter of hours as secondary Staphylococcus infection causes the top layers of the skin to break down and as pus becomes trapped in the hair. Hot spots can be treated with corticosteroid medications and oral as well as topical antibiotic application, as well as clipping hair from around the lesion. Underlying inciting causes include flea allergy dermatitis, ear disease or other allergic skin diseases. Dogs with thick undercoat are most subject to getting hot spots.
So the vet shaved a lot of hair off his tail around the sore, gave him some topical ointment and a shot to prevent the itching. He also gave me some antibiotics and some cream to put on him two times a day. Here is my sad little pup and his little rat tail. Howard already thinks Jack looks like a rat but this is just going to give him more unneeded ammunition. Try not to notice the faded, 70's era, paisley carpet in the background...My office could use a little updating.
Monday, September 21, 2009
Friday, September 18, 2009
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
H: Nah uh, no way, we are not taking him home Dana.
D: But he has a home, he has tags!! I'll drive out to Mayfield tomorrow and find his house, I promise.
D: Fine, we will stay here until I can get a hold of the owner.
D: Well I can't just let him go! What if he gets run over?? Huh? Then how will you feel?
H: Dana, we live in an apartment, we cannot keep another dog. Kentucky isn't like Virginia. His owner probably dropped him off here and they don't want him anymore.
D: But...but, they would take his tags off of him if they didn't want him anymore!
H: And if you can't ever get a hold of the owner? Then what?
D: I'll take him to a shelter. (Both of us knew I was lying)
Ugh. So I called the owner again on the way home and left a message stating exactly where I saw the dog and to call me as soon as she got my message. And then I cried. And wouldn't talk to Howard for a while. I tried to explain to him how I would feel if Jack got loose and how I would much rather him get taken in by someone like me then left out on the street.
And then the owner called and said she was on the way to get him and "thank you, thank you, thank you". I resumed crying but out of happiness this time. And Howard admitted he was wrong and should have listened to me about the dog having an owner.
In his defense, if he let me take in every single animal we come across, we'd be running a farm. As I have said before, I blame my mom. I am way to soft-hearted when it comes to animals and other people's problems and I always want to make it better even when it's ridiculous like the following examples of two times I have cried in the last week.
I cried watching Hook on Saturday morning. It was at the part where Peter Pan (Robin Williams) comes back to Neverland and the Lost Boys led by Rufio don't believe it's really him. But then the little boy feels Peter's face and says, "There you are Peter!" and some of the boys start crossing the line drawn in the sand to stand on Peter's side. Except I wasn't crying for Peter Pan, I was crying for Rufio because I felt bad he was going to lose his power.
I cried during the Thursday night Steelers/Titans game because Hines Ward fumbled the ball. Hines Ward is ALWAYS smiling. And I mean ALWAYS. We've nicknamed him "Smiley". He fumbled the ball and then he wasn't smiling anymore. And that made me cry.
Luckily Howard has had 3.5 years to get used to this and he deals with it well now. He used to say things like, "What are you crying for?? This isn't even sad! It's funny!" or "What did I do?? Did I say something wrong?" But now he thinks it's completely normal that I cry because Smiley stopped smiling. I mean, that's a big deal.
Again, all blame is on my mom.
On my mind...
1. My BFF, Ashley forgot my birthday this year…and I couldn’t be happier. I forgot her birthday years ago. I was hanging out with my then boyfriend when Ashley called.
Ash: Hey, what are you doing tonight?
Me: Probably just hanging out here.
Ash: Oh………..Well, do you want to hang out with me since it’s my birthday?
Me: Uh, oh, um, uh………….Sorry?
Around 10 pm on the night of my birthday, I turned to Howard and a huge grin spread across my face and said, “I think she forgot!!” to which he responded, “You are so weird.”
I called Ash after work on Tuesday thinking maybe she would say something like “Oh, Dane, I’ve been meaning to call you! Happy Birthday!” But instead we just had chatted for a few minutes about random stuff. And then:
Me: So, we are officially even now.
Me: It was my birthday yesterday.
I told her that it was the best gift she could ever give me. Now we are on even playing fields again. Equals. She can never bring it up again. HA!
The following year after I forgot her birthday, I pretended to forget again and just invited her to a hotel party I was going to. She had no idea that it was a surprise party for her. So I told her that she’s going to have to go big next year to make up for this year. Big like visiting me in KY. She asked me to please forget her birthday next year instead so she can be one up again. This is why she is my best friend.
2. Kanye West = Worthless
3. Jack peed on me the other day. We had been out with the dogs all day while we were fumigating for fleas in the apartment. It was hot and Jack was running around chasing tennis balls for an hour. During that hour, he must have gone over to the water spigot 15 times. When we got back home, I gave him two baths, one for fleas and one for dry skin that the flea shampoo gives him. Poor thing was worn out. He hates baths. He lay down on his blanket next to me on the couch and was out cold. When he woke up, he crawled onto my lap and was stretching when I felt something wet on my arm. I looked down and realized he was peeing on me. On Me. The dog doesn’t ever pee in the house. How could he pee on me? I set him on his blanket to get up but when I looked down at him, he was still peeing. Howard pushed him to the floor where he continued to pee! I took him outside after that. It was very strange. I think he was sleep-peeing.
4. I realized the other day that I never made it to Einstein’s to get bagels when I was home for a week. We don’t have any bagels shops here. Zero, zilch. So the next time you are having your delicious fresh bagel for breakfast, stop and think of poor me, and then laugh and go back to eating your deliciously, wonderful bagel.
I decided that I would get someone to send me bagels through the mail. That person would be my mom. So I emailed her Monday.
Me: Hello - I want an Einstein’s bagel for my birthday. Do you think if you bought one and put it in a plastic baggie and overnighted it to me, it would still be fresh? Because I think it would. Thanks.
Mom: Are you kidding me??? Frankly, if you miss them that much you should just "Move Back". You are just toooo funny!! Sure hope you are having a great day. Talk later.
Me: No, no kidding. Dead serious. Send me BAGELS!
When I talked to her later, she told me I was crazy but she would do it if it would make me happy. On Tuesday morning she went to Einstein’s and bought a baker’s dozen. She ate one (who could blame her??) and then went to Fed Ex to send me the rest. That will be $52.00 please. WHAT?!?! So she called me and told me there was no way she was going to spend that kind of money to ship me bagels and I was fine with that because although I am desperate for bagels, I am not that desperate.
She also told me during this conversation that my sister’s (half-sister if you want to get technical, but I’ll never call her that) grandmother passed away during the night. She got very choked up about it. Then bagels didn’t seem so important to me anymore. As my mom tried to compose herself, I heard her choke out, “And I’m sorry about your bagels.”
Five minutes later she called me back. She said, “I am sending them anyway. I want you to have them.” I told her not to send them but she was adamant. We agreed that she would go home and freeze them and then mail them express. From $52 down to $14 for shipping. No idea when I will receive them or if they will still be any good but I will be eating them even if they are bad as punishment for putting my mom through this. But I’ll just cross my fingers and hope they are delightful.
My amazing friend Amy also offered to send me some bagels as a birthday present but I could never put her through what I put my mom through. Amy and I aren't blood-related so she wouldn't still have to love me after going through this ordeal.
5. Rest in Peace Mrs. Hart/Nanny.
Friday, September 11, 2009
Friday, September 4, 2009
conversate- 1 dictionary result
|Part of Speech:||v|
|Definition:||to socialize and chat; to converse with another|
|Etymology:||back-formation from conversation|
- Main Entry: con·ver·sate
- Pronunciation: \ˈkän-vər-ˌsāt\
- Function: intransitive verb
- Inflected Form(s): con·ver·sat·ed; con·ver·sat·ing
- Etymology: back-formation from conversation
- Date: 1973